FR. LANTOM: Maybe you're being called to summon the better angels of your nature. Maybe that's the struggle you're feeling... deep within you.
MATTHEW: And how do you know the angels and the Devil inside me aren't the same thing?
FR. LANTOM: I don't, but nothing drives people to the Church faster than the thought of the Devil snapping at their heels. Maybe that was God's plan all along. Why he created him, allowed him to fall from grace... to become a symbol to be feared... warning to us all, to tread the path of the righteous.
Being exposed to the worst of evils is like tapping into an alternate reality. We hear stories on newspapers and TVs, stories of grave evils: We are constantly described of the horrors of war, murder, sexual abuse, etc. Yet an average person living in developed worlds do not know evil. They can hear the stories of evil all they want, but they will lack the emotional cognition to fully recognize the true state of this world. A person hearing stories of war view the world differently than those who have survived a war. Even if one does see the world in the same way, the lack of emotional cognition would turn empathy into indifference quite fast.
I hope none of you reading this have never had an occasion to have the emotional cognition, an occasion to fully realize just how fallen this world is. But when you do, perhaps this post could serve as a reminder to stay sane, a reminder that it is possible to stay sane even after the exposure to evil.
I have had such an exposure. In fact, I've had multiple. I cannot share certain stories for I lack the courage. I also find that, to share such stories, it would be impractical. I consider also the liberty I do not have to explaining the stories of other people who are involved in such exposures. So they will not be told in detail... only through vagueness.
Being exposed to such evils repeatedly is a funny thing. Once you see one, you start to develop an intuition about the evils of others. At some point, the intuition can get so refined to a point where one can detect evil intents in others. The lies told by a douchebag to a girl to seduce her to untold sadness in victims' eyes, one would notice them. One would find that such douchebags are great in number, and so too the victims. In short, one would see evil everywhere, within the Church and without. Religious or no, it does not matter.
In a religious setting, there are those who feign religiousness to mask their evil intents. For example, a guy who never lectors lectoring at mass to put on the appearance of virtue to seduce a religious girl. What sort of lustful infidelity drives a boy to use the holy liturgy as a means to his deformed fulfillment? In a secular setting, there are those who lie about his name and occupation to approach the girl he lusts after at a bar. And this one guy would pressure a girl who had previously been abused to having sex with him, claiming that such a consensual sex would help her "reclaim" herself from the abuse. Every time one would witness or hear such events, one gags in disgust.
I see such pathetic behaviors everywhere. Seeing evil everywhere makes one mad. This madness would cause one to have a warped view of reality, seeing dark corners everywhere... seeing the Devil everywhere. Once one has seen a person commit an evil, one sees the same look in people's eyes: The Devil in the potential wrongdoers. If this madness becomes serious enough, at one point, one would start to see the Devil in one's own eyes.
I suppose it is not a surprise. When one is exposed to great evils multiple times, one would be liable to having a sort of unquenchable rage, one that multiplies at the slightest of injustice. This rage claws at your conscience, calling you to violence and hatred toward mankind. One would become sick of it, feel exhausted by it to a point where one feels that something has to be done. And when this rage is put to action, no good can come out of it. For it would be from the Devil.
This sort of rage is apparent in cliched cop shows. The crime investigators would lead some sort of semi-depressed lives, drenched in the hatred toward mankind due to what a fellow human being can inflict upon the other. The shows cannot possibly make its average viewers empathize with the characters for they are mere fictions. At any rate, there are people like those characters in real life. This Devil in them, constantly clawing, would appear to them invulnerable. The Devil would eat them up, changing the personality and the demeanor toward vice, corrupting their souls. And all the while, the victim would develop self-hatred for such vices.
How, then, are we to defeat this Devil? It is a task one cannot accomplish alone, I have learned. What those who have been exposed to great evils need is love. This warped perception of reality they have needs to be re-warped into seeking the reality. I do not mean that we ought to warp their perception of reality to a point where they can only see rainbows and butterflies. What I propose is that they need to realize that their fellow human beings are capable of love and saintly moral strength.
So be virtuous, for their sake. Do not disappoint them. Put on an appearance of virtue, if you have to. With a pure intent, of course. Uplift them with kind words. It may be awkward, but hug them and say that everything will be okay. Although it may bring you discomfort, be with them and spend time with them. Listen to them and counsel them. Empathize with them, but do not complain out of anger lest you succumb to the Devil yourself. Instead, show them compassion and quiet temperance. Do not be morally indifferent for they are already sick of how the world is indifferent. Instead, show them that you are willing to go the extra mile for what is good and the beautiful.
I have seen hurt people seeking after love, seeking to find some good in this world. It is sad to say that I have seen too many sorely disappointed. To compensate for the pain that could not be resolved through love, they would resort to drugs and alcohol to mask it. Some would jump romantic relationships to another, hoping to find the sort of love that can heal them. I must say that I have failed miserably in showing love to others, and in turn been disappointed by others in consoling me. I wish that I could have said something better, something more compassionate and uplifting to those who are hurting. I also wish that the loved ones I sought love from held me in better compassion. Lacking as it may feel, however, I have received love from the few who would give. Because of this few I maintain my sanity. For that I thank God for them.
The point is this: The whole world does not have to be virtuous for those who are hurting, but only a handful. I have learned that most of the world would feel a momentary pity for those who are hurting but would turn indifferent within days. Or perhaps they would forget all about it after watching a cat video two minutes later. Even those who give support would become tired and give up. Very few remain persistent in giving love and support. But this few, this "happy few," matter in changing damaged people for the better.
To those who are hurt reading this, I hope to tell you that there is such a happy few in this world. To those who do not know what to do in the face of those who hurt, buy them a cup of coffee or something (but never alcohol), or lend them an umbrella on a rainy day. Little things count. To those who are indifferent, I hope to tell you to be more compassionate. To those attempting to empathize with the victims, do not show anger for they see enough anger to last a thousand lifetimes in themselves. Instead, show quietness of the mind.
I have had such an exposure. In fact, I've had multiple. I cannot share certain stories for I lack the courage. I also find that, to share such stories, it would be impractical. I consider also the liberty I do not have to explaining the stories of other people who are involved in such exposures. So they will not be told in detail... only through vagueness.
Being exposed to such evils repeatedly is a funny thing. Once you see one, you start to develop an intuition about the evils of others. At some point, the intuition can get so refined to a point where one can detect evil intents in others. The lies told by a douchebag to a girl to seduce her to untold sadness in victims' eyes, one would notice them. One would find that such douchebags are great in number, and so too the victims. In short, one would see evil everywhere, within the Church and without. Religious or no, it does not matter.
In a religious setting, there are those who feign religiousness to mask their evil intents. For example, a guy who never lectors lectoring at mass to put on the appearance of virtue to seduce a religious girl. What sort of lustful infidelity drives a boy to use the holy liturgy as a means to his deformed fulfillment? In a secular setting, there are those who lie about his name and occupation to approach the girl he lusts after at a bar. And this one guy would pressure a girl who had previously been abused to having sex with him, claiming that such a consensual sex would help her "reclaim" herself from the abuse. Every time one would witness or hear such events, one gags in disgust.
I see such pathetic behaviors everywhere. Seeing evil everywhere makes one mad. This madness would cause one to have a warped view of reality, seeing dark corners everywhere... seeing the Devil everywhere. Once one has seen a person commit an evil, one sees the same look in people's eyes: The Devil in the potential wrongdoers. If this madness becomes serious enough, at one point, one would start to see the Devil in one's own eyes.
I suppose it is not a surprise. When one is exposed to great evils multiple times, one would be liable to having a sort of unquenchable rage, one that multiplies at the slightest of injustice. This rage claws at your conscience, calling you to violence and hatred toward mankind. One would become sick of it, feel exhausted by it to a point where one feels that something has to be done. And when this rage is put to action, no good can come out of it. For it would be from the Devil.
This sort of rage is apparent in cliched cop shows. The crime investigators would lead some sort of semi-depressed lives, drenched in the hatred toward mankind due to what a fellow human being can inflict upon the other. The shows cannot possibly make its average viewers empathize with the characters for they are mere fictions. At any rate, there are people like those characters in real life. This Devil in them, constantly clawing, would appear to them invulnerable. The Devil would eat them up, changing the personality and the demeanor toward vice, corrupting their souls. And all the while, the victim would develop self-hatred for such vices.
How, then, are we to defeat this Devil? It is a task one cannot accomplish alone, I have learned. What those who have been exposed to great evils need is love. This warped perception of reality they have needs to be re-warped into seeking the reality. I do not mean that we ought to warp their perception of reality to a point where they can only see rainbows and butterflies. What I propose is that they need to realize that their fellow human beings are capable of love and saintly moral strength.
So be virtuous, for their sake. Do not disappoint them. Put on an appearance of virtue, if you have to. With a pure intent, of course. Uplift them with kind words. It may be awkward, but hug them and say that everything will be okay. Although it may bring you discomfort, be with them and spend time with them. Listen to them and counsel them. Empathize with them, but do not complain out of anger lest you succumb to the Devil yourself. Instead, show them compassion and quiet temperance. Do not be morally indifferent for they are already sick of how the world is indifferent. Instead, show them that you are willing to go the extra mile for what is good and the beautiful.
I have seen hurt people seeking after love, seeking to find some good in this world. It is sad to say that I have seen too many sorely disappointed. To compensate for the pain that could not be resolved through love, they would resort to drugs and alcohol to mask it. Some would jump romantic relationships to another, hoping to find the sort of love that can heal them. I must say that I have failed miserably in showing love to others, and in turn been disappointed by others in consoling me. I wish that I could have said something better, something more compassionate and uplifting to those who are hurting. I also wish that the loved ones I sought love from held me in better compassion. Lacking as it may feel, however, I have received love from the few who would give. Because of this few I maintain my sanity. For that I thank God for them.
The point is this: The whole world does not have to be virtuous for those who are hurting, but only a handful. I have learned that most of the world would feel a momentary pity for those who are hurting but would turn indifferent within days. Or perhaps they would forget all about it after watching a cat video two minutes later. Even those who give support would become tired and give up. Very few remain persistent in giving love and support. But this few, this "happy few," matter in changing damaged people for the better.
To those who are hurt reading this, I hope to tell you that there is such a happy few in this world. To those who do not know what to do in the face of those who hurt, buy them a cup of coffee or something (but never alcohol), or lend them an umbrella on a rainy day. Little things count. To those who are indifferent, I hope to tell you to be more compassionate. To those attempting to empathize with the victims, do not show anger for they see enough anger to last a thousand lifetimes in themselves. Instead, show quietness of the mind.
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